Well, first of all, you should deinstall your previous version of Kopete. Then reinstall the new one (0.8.2 or whatever). If there was no error messages, then open the "Run Command..." dialog either from the KMenu of by pressing Alt+F2. If your install worked, type in "kopete", press enter, and it should start.
To add it to KMenu, first try the Menu Updating Tool, which is situated under KMenu->Utilities->Desktop. Press "Scan" and see if it finds it itself, if so, select it and press "Apply" and it should be in your KMenu.
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